January
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Positives: Skiing, caring for plants, planning for the new year, Hadestown, believing I was going to get into the PhD in Law program at Yale, Moulin Rouge w/Dan, X-men and frog crossstitching, planning to get legally adopted by Lori, becomming friends w/Rachel.
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Negatives: Stress on ski vacation because of Joshua losing his car, weirdness of feeling like I have lost Henry as a friend.
February
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Positives: Getting smartwool long underwear, Night Yorb surviving being trimmed, believing I could get the Quattrone fellowship, feeling confident in my new purple swimsuit, playing Horizon Forbidden West starting to see real muscle growth in my upper body, gettiny m Purim costume, Sleep No More, spending time with Orlando, Juliana, and Thrailkill and seeing Punch Brothers.
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Negatives: Chlilpad breaking, Valentine’s day feeling weird because relationship is unsteady, getting rejected by PhD in Law program
March
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Positives: Feeling like I nailed the Quattrone interview, perm, feeling like I’m seeing changes from exercising, big Purim party, feeling understood by Rabbi Jason from Israel, the Dead Sea
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Negatives: Bad weather for Purim, getting rejected by the Quattrone Center, getting held at Israeli customs, the coldest March in 100 years in Israel, the immense heartbreak of Israel and Palestine, the judgement I faced as a Jew on the iTrek trip, feeling like a failure because of not getting an academic position
April
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Positives: Counseling helping with overcoming feelings of failure, painting mimic mini, law prom, getting cute swimsuit and swimsuit cover to prepare for Greece trip, preparing for conversion, getting adopted, getting a handle on repaying loans thanks to GULC financial advisor, Barcade singles night, pre-passover farm harvest, watching Prince of Egypt with friends, getting paper debt forgiven, getting graduation outfit
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Negatives: Joshua not enjoying much of law prom, family drama because of adoption, other student getting mad at me in clinic, relationship stress picking up again
May
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Positives: New plants, Little Shop and the Little Shop after party, Shabbat dinner at Avi’s, planning to move, graduating law school, spending time with family around graduation, converting to Judaism, making my first challah, getting stainless steel pan, plants growing, getting new swimsuits
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Negatives: Piercing healing problems, strange sternum rash, relationship stress picking up
June
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Positives: Spending time with friend visiting from LA, making a kokedama, seeing first pictures of Sal, planning to move, seeing the Mets, painting with Eric, dinner w/Rabbi Ponet, Mets game w/Yanni, Mets game w/Alec, Gabrielle’s pre-July 4 party, perm looking nice
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Negatives: Allergic reation to the kokedama moss, taking the NYLE, relationship stress mounting especially around moving details, Shabbat dinner cancelled because Roe overturned, AC breaking, stress of de-tangling long viney plants
July
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Positives: Moving to New York, Thor Love and Thunder, outfitting new apartment, Dan’s birthday dinner, new perm, getting Richard III Shakespeare in the Park tickets and attending it, getting new pictures of kitten Sal, getting new TV, feeling confident about most of the bar, dinner with Orlando and Kira bar day one, pool day with Orlando after bar day two, Yanni’s birthday party, brunch and nails with Amir’s family,
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Negatives: Hosting a guest before being unpacked, relationship stress peaking with being unsupported during COVID, being very symptomatic with COVID right before taking the bar, the first day of the bar being unexpectedly difficult
August
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Positives: Begining bedroom planning and painting, seeing Jill in Portland, getting new cool silverware, feeling so much less stressed after breakup, getting cool fanny pack, getting Greece nails, Greece Greece Greece Greece Greece all of it the sun the reading the friendship the Mamos
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Negatives: Realizing in Portland that I need to end my relationship, breaking up with boyfriend, bad massage at Massage Envy, having to sprint through the Paris airport to not miss flight only to realize I wasn’t in danger of missing the flight, Boston visit plans getting changed last minute
September
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Positives: Visiting Boston friends, baseball weekend with dad, bringing home Salazar, painting the bedroom, meeting Brock and starting to spend time with him, friends meeting Sal, Juliana visiting and getting suit fitting, making a rug for Salazar, socializing on the law firm hike, Met Opera w/Yanni
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Negatives: Coming back to apartment to discovery huge leak in kitchen ceiling, having trouble finding a good couch, worrying about Sal’s eye, feeling so tired and sick after the law firm hike, nerves of Sal potentially being sick while I was on hike
October
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Positives: Having a thoughtful Yom Kippur, catching up w/Dennis, catching up w/Kenny, Alec’s housewarming, so many good dates with Brock, massage and polish before first day of job, brunch with friends on weekend, getting new gym clothes, passing the bar, feeling very fit, snuggles with Sal, finishing painting, feeling excited about work, becomming official with Brock
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Negatives: Feeling like a lot of questions were unanswered and unnecessarily stressful at work
November
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Positives: Chasing Kira for the marathon, visitng DC for Orlando and Juliana’s play, a bunch of time with Brock, Juliana visits for second suit fitting and Into the Woods, Lori visits and we see Phantom and set up Sal’s platforms, feeling fit with many trips to the gym, adding touches to the apartment, snuggling with Sal
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Negatives: Weirdness with Joshua at bar, feeling nervous about work being slow, struggling to find professional clothes that fit
December
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Positives: Seeing the Menu, holiday party, hanging with Noam, seeing Black Panther, hanging with Amir and Reagan, Colleen’s visit and seeing the Play that Goes Wrong again, ski vacation, celebrating Hanukkah
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Negatives: Feeling stress about not knowing if it’s okay to have my phone off because of work, fear of not getting picked up by cab when we arrive at ski trip
Take-Aways
Positives:
- Buying clothes that make me feel confident was a big positive this year, probably spurred on by the combination of knowing that I would soon be making a good salary, and feeling more confident in my own skin thanks to time in the gym. Near the end of the year, I’ve really come to realize how much of my clothing is just hand-me-downs that never really sparked joy, they were just better than nothing, or better than what else I could afford. In the next year, I’d like to spend an inordinate amount of money getting clothes that make me feel great.
- Feeling good about my body because of exercise was a big positive this year too. Definitely going to keep that rolling next year.
Negatives:
- My most consistent stress this year came from various romantic relationship troubles, which is difficult to “fix” because a lot of my big positives of the year came from romantic relationship things too. I’m pretty sure that’s just the paradox of being vulnerable and known with people, but I’ll try to keep my eye out next year to make sure I’m not staying in situations that aren’t great.